A Blog From 30,000 Feet, Seat 16D

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Right now, in our group, there are 18 people, 5 computers, 2 portable DVD players, 14 ipods, 3 iphones, 9 pairs of headphones and 3 Nintendo DS’s.

This is just how forefathers envisioned the family vacation.

We’re spread out over 7 rows, strangers all around. Not sure how far away Vegas is, but we’ll only be there for an hour or so anyway. Estimated guess on how much money will be lost in Vegas, by these 18 people, in those 60 minutes? $146.75.

We’re scheduled to arrive at Burbank at about 2:50pm Pacific Time. My guess, is we’ll be out of the airport by 4.

Then, it’s chase our tail all the way to our rental house in Newport Beach. Once we arrive, and we all fight over who gets what room, and who wants what for dinner, it may be midnight before we eat. But hey, that’s what vacations are all about.

On the agenda tomorrow is a little journey to the Magic Kingdom.

No wonder Jon and Kate split up.

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Storytime 1.0, The 2nd Grade

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Once upon a time, there was a little boy. We’ll just call him Beau.

Beau, lived a very average childhood, not a whole lot to complain about, but not a lot of shiny happy trophies to parade about either.  This story focuses on a certain aspect of young Beau’s life, the 2nd grade.

One August day, on the first day of school, young Beau was dropped off at his brand new school by his young mom. His mom was much younger than all the other 2nd grader’s mothers. Of course, as 2nd graders, Beau and his classmates had no way of knowing this. When you’re in 2nd grade, and you’re mom is 25, she might as well be 85, you truly have no idea.  Continue reading

Romantic Comedies Are For Chicks

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Ok look, if you’ve seen my Top 100 Favorite Movies List, then you know I’m not afraid of the Romantic Comedy. I’m all for guys and gals meeting and falling in love. I’m all for the simple movie concept of boy meets girl/boy loses girl/boy gets girl back. I get it.  It’s been the Hollywood standard since we entered the realm of talkies, and probably even before. Heck, I’m not a Shakespearean by any means, but I’m sure that dude had it down pat also.

I come to you today with a beef. I’m speaking today on behalf of the forgotten soul in the romantic comedy. You’ve seen the movies, you know how it works, the hero has to win the girl from the guy who is not right for her, or so he says. He then proceeds to spend 87 minutes of screen time, wooing this damsel into his domain. Continue reading

Kids scare the crap outta me

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As I laid in bed this morning, with the Snow Patrol going through my head, doing everything in my power to just “lay here”.  I really, REALLY, didn’t want to get out of my cozy bed.  I’m one of those guys that waits too long to go to bed, then pays for it in the morning. I’m like a child really. In fact, as a child, I was the same way. I would kick and scream to not go to bed, then, it would take my mom like 30 minutes to get me out of bed. I’m pretty sure she would just grab me by the ankle, drag me out from under my covers, down the hall, into the bathroom, or wherever else I needed to go until I woke up. I can actually remember sleeping in the hallway, because I was too tired to get ready for school.  Pretty sure I never energized myself with a healthy breakfast, and Lord knows you DON’T fall asleep on the bus, for fear of waking up with who knows what, who knows where. This must be why I have very little recollection of middle school. Continue reading

Alternative Realities

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Ok, you may have to bear with me on this, it’s late at night, and my mind wanders.  Actually, I can’t blame it on that. First of all, my mind has been wandering since about 1983, so if anyone sees it, please either report back to me how it’s doing, or retrieve it, and mail it back to me.  Where was I?  Oh yeah, mind wandering……. Continue reading